SECTUAL

I just prayed to the Lord and requested a frisky wife  for to help me with household duties and to work in my little silver mine . He answered fast and told me to    advertise everywhere for a petite blonde   with brown eyes and a warm heart .  If anybody here knows   where to find my wife  please tell me , if God is talking to you     you will know   .  Thanks

More like Vanderdoom...

OP needs a blonde haired brown eyed lady to repopulate the world with.

Required: Must be into vigorous exercise.

It so happens that I know of such a woman, Mr. Vanderboom. Only she's a beach blonde with brown contact lenses. I'll set you up a date with her if you like.