04-26-2020, 01:36 PM
I have a special place in my heart for Goth chicks. Have since the 90's.
But there's always been one small issue I've had with the lovely ladies
of the undead. Ink. Those many works of art that seem to adorn the
bodies of most Goth girls.
Now, this isn't to say that I'm against tattoos, body art/modification.
It's just that sometimes, it can be a little much. And this goes WELL
beyond Goth chicks. So really, just across the entire spectrum of females
out there wishing to spill ink on their skin. My thoughts on that. But I'm
using Goth girls as my example because, well Hell, they're Goth girls! Does
there really need to be any other reason? Any other dark, luscious, candy-sweet,
dirty-dirty-sexy reasons? *whew*
Obviously, live your life and be who you are but in regards to the tatt, I can only
say that less is more. Or rather, more strategically placed is more. Meaning, there
are just some areas that one should never cover up with ink. Of course I will list
them, what am I, a philistine?
1) Titties.
This should be painfully obvious for everyone. Tits are already a grand work of
art, perfection at it's finest. For the love of God and ham sandwiches, PLEASE,
please just leave those soft yummy orbs alone. Thank you! ; )
2) The Tummy.
Now there will be many objections to this one, but I must adhere to my convictions.
Why on Earth would you want to go and cover over an already finished canvas of
soft, delicious, pale glory? It just doesn't make sense! Not to mention, if/when you
get pregnant, inky art is gonna look kiiinda weird all stretched out on that seed pod.
Ladies, step away from the bellies. That last line didn't come out on paper sounding
as good as it did in my head. *sigh*
3) Them THIGHS!
OK, OK, I know. You don't have to say anything. I get it. This is prime real estate for
ink art. And I even agree! BUT... keep it tasteful. To a minimum. Delicate. Maybe something
just on the outer edge between the upper hip and knee-bend region. No need to go crazy
here. Accentuate, don't obliterate. And don't you EVER dare think of marking up the tops
or inner thigh areas! This is an unforgivable sin for which you will be eternally punished.
I'm picturing a 24/7 loop of Maroon 5 beaming at you like an energy weapon. Seriously
though: That upper, inner thigh is sacred, worshipful territory, girls. Respect it!
4) The Ass.
Lastly, but certainly not leastly: That wondrous, creamy, squishy-bouncy-jiggly reason for living...
Yes, THAT ASS! I'm really hoping that this is just some good ol' preaching-into-the-choir but I can't
just gloss over it and not give mention. Under NO circumstances, ever, and I mean EVERRR, are
you to even think about defacing that already deified patch of Heaven on Earth. You can't. You
shouldn't. And please, my God, sweet Jesus on a candy cane, just don't do it!! Wars have been
fought over far less, ladies, this I can tell you! So just do the entire Multiverse a solid and let
those big scrumptious alabaster booties BE! *wipes sweat from brow*
Well, I think that just about does it. A big shout out to all the Goth chicks out there. We thank you
for keeping the world super hot & sexy!
But there's always been one small issue I've had with the lovely ladies
of the undead. Ink. Those many works of art that seem to adorn the
bodies of most Goth girls.
Now, this isn't to say that I'm against tattoos, body art/modification.
It's just that sometimes, it can be a little much. And this goes WELL
beyond Goth chicks. So really, just across the entire spectrum of females
out there wishing to spill ink on their skin. My thoughts on that. But I'm
using Goth girls as my example because, well Hell, they're Goth girls! Does
there really need to be any other reason? Any other dark, luscious, candy-sweet,
dirty-dirty-sexy reasons? *whew*
Obviously, live your life and be who you are but in regards to the tatt, I can only
say that less is more. Or rather, more strategically placed is more. Meaning, there
are just some areas that one should never cover up with ink. Of course I will list
them, what am I, a philistine?
1) Titties.
This should be painfully obvious for everyone. Tits are already a grand work of
art, perfection at it's finest. For the love of God and ham sandwiches, PLEASE,
please just leave those soft yummy orbs alone. Thank you! ; )
2) The Tummy.
Now there will be many objections to this one, but I must adhere to my convictions.
Why on Earth would you want to go and cover over an already finished canvas of
soft, delicious, pale glory? It just doesn't make sense! Not to mention, if/when you
get pregnant, inky art is gonna look kiiinda weird all stretched out on that seed pod.
Ladies, step away from the bellies. That last line didn't come out on paper sounding
as good as it did in my head. *sigh*
3) Them THIGHS!
OK, OK, I know. You don't have to say anything. I get it. This is prime real estate for
ink art. And I even agree! BUT... keep it tasteful. To a minimum. Delicate. Maybe something
just on the outer edge between the upper hip and knee-bend region. No need to go crazy
here. Accentuate, don't obliterate. And don't you EVER dare think of marking up the tops
or inner thigh areas! This is an unforgivable sin for which you will be eternally punished.
I'm picturing a 24/7 loop of Maroon 5 beaming at you like an energy weapon. Seriously
though: That upper, inner thigh is sacred, worshipful territory, girls. Respect it!
4) The Ass.
Lastly, but certainly not leastly: That wondrous, creamy, squishy-bouncy-jiggly reason for living...
Yes, THAT ASS! I'm really hoping that this is just some good ol' preaching-into-the-choir but I can't
just gloss over it and not give mention. Under NO circumstances, ever, and I mean EVERRR, are
you to even think about defacing that already deified patch of Heaven on Earth. You can't. You
shouldn't. And please, my God, sweet Jesus on a candy cane, just don't do it!! Wars have been
fought over far less, ladies, this I can tell you! So just do the entire Multiverse a solid and let
those big scrumptious alabaster booties BE! *wipes sweat from brow*
Well, I think that just about does it. A big shout out to all the Goth chicks out there. We thank you
for keeping the world super hot & sexy!