Yeah,
those things...
So I, kinda have one... that I'm about to openly admit to... right here... in front of God and everybody.
Sometimes* I use the underside end of my t-shirt as a napkin... while/after eating.
I know, I'm a dirty bitch, but it's true. I do it. Now about that little *
I only ever do it when I forget to bring napkins/paper towels/wet wipes in here with me.
And NEVER with a decent t-shirt - One that I would wear outside of the house.
It's always with a funky-ass, hole-infested, ripped, torn, stretched-out sleep shirt.
Koala Jesus doesn't hold a thing against me... and neither should You!
MO and I both eat our own corona boogers. There's a thread about it here somewhere.
OK, so I don't know if this is a
habit or some kind of biological tick. [Years now]
This happens mostly when I'm watching stuff, laying on the bed YouTubing or Netflixing.
But I catch myself biting my tongue as it's pressed firmly up against the roof of my mouth.
Sometimes kinda gently sucking on it, inwardly. It's weird. But the biting part is what kinda
concerns me. It's a default I've noticed that I go into daily. I don't know if it's a bad sign
or just that I'm a weirdo. Like we all didn't already know that!
Another small peek into the gross little mystery that is me.
I was going to post this days ago but as usual, this is me we're talkin' about here.
I know this is more than a bad habit. And it's certainly not unique to Me. It's what I'd call an epidemic
across most of Humanity: Stress & Worry.
I do it. Sometimes... A LOT! I know it's pointless. I know it's no good for me, yet there are still times
that I allow it to rule me. I know I'm not alone, far from it! It's not as bad as it once was but still, it's
pretty lame and has far too many moments present in my life. Not daily, but still often enough to consider
it a regular thing.
I've come a long way though. Especially being unmedicated [for my depression/anxiety] and drug/alcohol
free. Sobriety helps more than just the stress and worry issues but it's been a good solid foundation upon
which I've been able to re-establish continuity of thought AND more than fleeting instances of Peace of mind.
But I'm not victorious yet. I don't think it's a fight you ever win "once and for all". Like sobriety or any other
thing that takes dedication, it's a daily endeavor. Putting in the time and effort. It's an issue that really should
be given more serious thought. Too many people just throw their hands up and say "What can you do?" because
it's become something we just expect to have in our lives. It eventually runs rough shod long enough and
really wears some people down bringing on serious illness.
When I was around 8 my mother was diagnosed with cervical cancer. Her doctor had a little framed paper
on the wall behind his desk that was simply three words in black: STRESS - CANCER - DEATH.
She survived the illness for over 30 years but she was still a bundle of nerves.
All that to say this: Stress and Worry has its place in our lives, sure. It can't be avoided. But allowing it to
dominate and endanger our health and ultimately our Lives; we're better than that!
I'm going to make more of an effort to reduce those negative feelings when they crop up. I hope you
can and will do the same!