At what point do you just let go?
Just give up?
Realize all this does not matter anymore?
And what happens when you realize you are just walking around ......................and you don't give a fuck anymore.
Like..............Ghost Walking.?????????????
And how many times have you pulled over on a highway bridge over pass.......
Crying...while traffic blew passed by you at 70 miles per hour....
while you stared at the fence would have to climb???
And think about all the ones that say and claim they love you.
But if that is true.....
Why are you pulled over with your hazard lights on , on the side of the highway on a highway bridge overpass???
Everyone flying past you at 70 miles an hour. While you are crying so hard alone in your car you can't see or breathe?
Light that cigarette......roll out your car door in the the night blasting rain .
Climb that fence.. Fuck them all.
Turn around , and fall.....
I've lived in social isolation for a couple of years so it doesn't really matter anymore, the pretense life is easier when you've truly known yourself alone, I go through life like this now
I often find myself sitting on a bench somewhere peaceful, my left leg places itself over my right leg, my right elbow places itself on top of my left leg which is on top of my right leg, my right hand forms a fist while my chin decides to place itself on this fist and I just sit there wondering "ain't life a goddarn mystery... I can see everything except myself"
(05-24-2017, 01:10 AM)NowServingNumber52 Wrote: [ -> ]And think about all the ones that say and claim they love you.
But if that is true.....
Why are you pulled over with your hazard lights on , on the side of the highway on a highway bridge overpass???
Everyone flying past you at 70 miles an hour. While you are crying so hard alone in your car you can't see or breathe?
Light that cigarette......roll out your car door in the the night blasting rain .
Climb that fence.. Fuck them all.
Turn around , and fall.....
I have known 2 people who jumped , one of them named Kelly was having trouble with depression and had been for years and was visibly depressed didn't try to cover it up - he jumped right onto the train tracks below the bridge ,game over . The other guy named Rick was always quick to smile , was outgoing and just finished university chemistry degree but came from traumatic childhood , he jumped into the river and was never found , just his car beside the bridge recovered . Then there was another guy who shot himself in the head and I had talked with him about 3 days previously ... but this was his second serious attempt .
Suicide is just dumb in most cases-emotion make us all really stupid at times(overreacting) , i always think of this song at the darkest times :
'there should be sunshine after rain'