I halfway think phones shouldn't even be a thing...

[Mister Obvious]

I mean they're just SUCH a total fucking intrusion.

They ring and ding all loud and out of the blue.

Meh, I don't like it...

I think the concept of phones should be revolutionized.

They should, at the very least, NOT go off in a loud manner at random.

[Mister Obvious]

I've set my ringtone to the most chill, relaxing shit that makes me tingle in my nether regions and it's STILL wholly startling and unwanted when the phone begins to ring...

[Mister Obvious]

I find that landlines are the most violent offenders in this arena...

Because they have those totally unimaginative rings that are simply loud.

That's all they are. They're not melodic, they're not customizable, they're just...

Random, disturbing, loud, totally unwelcome intrusions.

[Guest]

dude , I have all phone/message settings on mute

they was jangling the very core of my being

and one day I said

[Mister Obvious]

And I said...

[Guest]

@ 2:00

[Mister Obvious]

I see Chris Farley in a different way now than I've ever seen him before.