Sometimes I like to stroke my ponytail and pretend it's a penis...

[Mister Obvious]

It's so soft and smooth.

[Cream of Caulk]

I love that velvety feel of my husband's penis when he pokes me in the cheek, on the outside of my face, not from the inside, I think my saliva and teeth would take away from that feeling.

[Mister Obvious]

I love soft dick.

The penis is such an amazing phenomenon...

It's hard, but soft and smooth at the same time.

And if the gods have truly smiled upon us, it's veiny too.

*eats footlong chili dog, ruefully gazes into space and time*

I dick.

[Cream of Caulk]

I got some dick today, it was hard and fluffy on the top, like a mushroom.

[Dreamz]

*sits down quietly*

[Mister Obvious]

Ahh, that mushroom tip though!

I'm strictly against circumcision, but I'll tell ya...

What's done is done...

[Cream of Caulk]

Ahh, that mushroom tip though!

I'm strictly against circumcision, but I'll tell ya...

What's done is done...

He was born with a defect, no foreskin, all the holy men are born this way.

The mushroom tip is extra thick and fluffy af.