"Hi, I'd like to be your significant other."

[Mister Obvious]

its scary because I think people instantly start to wonder about motivations when a serious offer appears on the table

Thanks for expounding upon this issue, that makes sense!

like you could be anybody , sometimes I wonder if you are tied to a doomsday cult and trying to recruit new guys

Kenny WTF, I told you never to publicly discuss our private conversations?!