02-24-2022, 02:44 PM
So Stephi says she broke up with Morgan, and she's now living in the van with her dog.
I have the video paused and I just want to share some of my initial thoughts...
Right off the bat, this strikes me as feeling right. You gotta keep in mind, Stephi's van isn't just some unfinished, cold metal interior van situation. It's actually finished in a very cozy way. It LOOKS like a mini house. It's very nice.
There are countless women and men who live in their vans, with their dog (and some even have a cat instead). As far as people who do mobile living, she has the absolute perfect setup. Vans ARE the ultimate mobile living vehicle. They're stealth and they're glorious.
Now she has the freedom to go anywhere in the US she wants to. That's a level of freedom and heaven on earth that few ever get to taste or understand. I've been there! And when I was, I chose to head out west. Doesn't really matter where she goes so much as it just matters that she keeps warm when it's appropriate (and cooled off when it's hot out).
As long as she's living in comfort temperately, there's nothing bad or dangerous about van life. It's a wonderful way to live, and she has the ultimate setup for it on every level... complete with a popular YouTube channel and therefore a way to make money online. She is living a wonderful life right now.
However, she was in a long term relationship that I'm guessing just didn't really go all that well, and she's gonna have to recover from that. It takes months to even begin to see through the hurt and disappointment. So people gotta remember to be patient during that time and just focus on themselves and maintaining their freedom.
Back to actually watching the video...
0:27 ah, man. I feel the sadness on that one. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt/mug/magnet, and the postcard. I know how it feels. It's sad as shit, it hurts real bad... but there's life beyond it.
It also hurts to see the dogs running around all excited. This is why I don't like dogs. I LOVE them. I adore them. I love all animals. (I used to say I didn't like coyotes... but I saw a baby coyote running around in the wilderness like a year ago, and I totally changed my mind. I love coyotes too.) But dogs... they really break my heart and buttscrew my soul. They're so unconditionally loving, and it's just heartbreaking. I have sworn off ever having any pets again... animals always find a way into your life somehow, be it outside cats or just whatever animal totem seems to hang around. I will feed and love outside animals, but I'm done taking on pets into the home.
In Stephi's situation, it's actually a good thing to have a dog with her in the van. The only thing that isn't so great about it is the necessity of walking it to use the bathroom. I personally don't get out of the vehicle during the night whenever I'm car camping at a rest area or some place like that. I just consider it a bit dangerous. But in Stephi's case, the dog is protection in and of itself, so having to get out to walk it probably isn't as dangerous. If I lived a mobile lifestyle, I would opt not to have any pets. It's just a personal preference... Stephi's an animal lover and loves dogs. I'm a cat person, so dog and cat people really just see things differently and have different needs.
0:48 if Stephi enjoyed living in a home, she really should take solace because someday if she wants to, she will live in a home (of her own) again. It's not gonna be the last time. And maybe next time she'll even get to be alone in it, and have things on her own terms. If she wants to, she could live in it by herself (with her dogs etc.) and not have to deal with a romantic partner being there at all. That house looks kinda big though, I think a smaller house would have a more cozy feel for her in the future.
1:00 so she put it in storage, she was taking apart a bed and everything. Yeesh it's a lot of work... I'm proud of her for getting it done though. Storage units are a good solution. If she decides she doesn't want the stuff and there's nowhere to put it, she could just sell the things, or let payments lapse on the storage unit and the owners get free stuff. I know that sounds insane/retarded to some people, but hey... remember our mantra here. Freedom. Nothing really binds us, and that's the truth. Absolutely nothing. Not on paper. Not in the mind. Not even in heart. We are all free, and we shouldn't accept the illusions that seek to make us feel otherwise.
1:20 oh that's cool, she got help moving all the stuff. I guess what's his name left her high and dry or something. If all the stuff is getting moved out of the house then I guess he's not there anymore. If that's the case then at least he didn't give her any trouble with it. Him skedaddling is a lot better than him putting up a fight.
1:40 in general, I just feel like the situation she experienced with her ex-BF brought her down really low. Seems like it really just took a lot of fire out of her engines and made her feel like shit. That's not to point the finger of blame at her ex or anyone else... it's not about that. Sometimes situations just aren't meant for us, sometimes we're just not meant to be with certain people, sometimes things just don't go together. Sometimes things just aren't right. It's not necessarily anyone's fault. I just feel bad for Stephi because I think it all was a really suck experience for her. I know how that kinda stuff feels, and it's sad. It really does hurt. But there's life beyond it, and better than ever too. I also know that.
I think Stephi has a lot of feelings. She's really deep and it just hurts that much more for people who have that 'still waters' thing going on. I wish her so much healing and comfort.
2:00 I know this is probably the wrong time, but her eyebrows look amazing. Like I was thinking that earlier but I just didn't say anything.
2:20 the one thing I'll say about her "let 'em down gently" approach here is NEVER get back together with an ex. Seriously. Once they become an ex, let that shit be forever. No, it's not necessary to blame them for anything, even if they DID really suck and they WERE the problem... it's not like we gotta carry that verdict around with us. It's okay to let it go and just remember the good times that were shared. But when it comes down to it, never forget that the whole situation failed for a reason, and never get back together with an ex. It never works out.
2:40 I love Stephi and I'm so glad she's still with us. I'm so glad that she gets to live and have a future and see more life. She really is so special. I know everything will be fine for her and she will feel better and heal from these experiences she's had.
She has had such a unique life, and it hasn't been easy... there have been so many hurtles to overcome both physically and mentally. You could spend the whole rest of your life recovering from a start like that. But I think the most important thing for her to focus on IS her health, her mental well-being, and just enjoying every minute of every day to the best of her ability. I don't think anybody (or any situation) should ever be putting any kinda pressure on Stephi ever again. If she encounters pressure, especially from PEOPLE... avoid. Avoid, avoid.
The whole rest of her life needs to be taken easy. She should consider herself retired... but on a deeper level than retirement usually means. For most people, it's just about jobs and careers. But for Stephi... it should be retirement from suffering and fear. We're all gonna encounter pain and other issues in life, in various forms... but if Stephi learns that anything brings suffering on her needlessly, she should make sure she avoids it for good. The rest of her life should be as easy as possible... even if she lives to be 100.
3:24 oh, she has a therapist! That's wonderful news. I love to hear that. Sometimes it can be hard to find a good one. I was telling a friend recently, mental health professionals are just people like anyone else. And we don't ALL get along with every single person, so sometimes you gotta look around a bit before you find a doctor etc. that you really jive with. This actually applies to all doctors and professionals. Sometimes it's so hard for people to get over the initial hurdle of getting help in the first place... we can get discouraged if we don't 'click' with a doctor. It's important to power through that and keep looking for the right fit though, so many wonderful doctors and mental health pros in this world.
One tool that I use to get the best help possible is to practice talking to the doctor. I make sure I walk through all the important info they need to know, and especially in the case of mental health, it's important to be very honest about every single thing and don't hold back anything out of embarrassment or feeling like it's too much. I just sort of have the conversation several times to myself, until I feel like I haven't missed anything important, then it's easier to talk about it with the doctor next time I see them.
6:35 yeah I'd just give them the stuff in the storage unit, lmao. Give it some months first though til I get tired of paying the bill.
7:28 TBH, Stephi's got balls of steel... I'm not worried about her. I'm hella proud of her in so many ways. I hope she makes more videos on her channel and goes traveling around.
8:25 awww, Stephi's such a youngster. It's always sad to turn the page, but the next chapter is full of great things so let's go.
8:50, ah, Love's travel center. America's home away from home. I'm a Pilot/Flying J girl, but I always love seeing a Love's.
When you get out there on the road and get a taste of that delicious freedom and expanse... it's hard to stop. I'm the type who drives off my hurt, so I probably would have ended up in New Mexico. Lmao.
Wow, I wrote a novella. K, I'm done.
(J/k.)
9:35 wow, since he was a puppy... awe, makes you realize how long Stephi and Morgan were together. It'll be an adjustment period for the dog, but he'll be fine. I wonder if that was the longest relationship Stephi's had? I guess it was about 2 years or so. I have had exclusively long term relationships and my longest was 8 years so I know it's hard to separate and it feels weird. I have so much compassion for Stephi. But like I said... exes are exes for a reason, so leave 'em in the past behind that rose colored lens and get yourself back together.
9:45 it's easy to tell that Stephi's an incredibly intelligent person with such deep thoughts. Wow, I'm so stoked to see more of her in the future and see where she goes from here.
10:20 she's so incredibly blessed to have that bitchin' van. I'd never let it go. For real. It's the kind of structure you can live in whether it actually runs as a vehicle or not. I believe in letting things go in life... but if I had a van like that? Pft. That'd be like the ONE thing I'd white knuckle no matter the fuck what. If I was Stephi, I'd save up some money and just buy a little piece of land somewhere that she likes. I know she has family who have a farm... it's not like she'd ever want for a place to park up. But she should get a small piece of land in a place where SHE likes to be. A place she enjoys scenically. That way she's got a claim staked, and she knows she can always park it up on that land no matter what. So important. Then if in the future she wants to put a structure on it, she could do that.
I'd take this opportunity to go balls to the wall with the freedom of mobile living, but I'd also balance that with the concept of a home base. A very economical piece of land fit for parking on in a place where no one will complain. Then maybe a structure to park under... like a carport. Then add another structure to it, like a shed for storage. Or maybe a shed to live in. Just little by little, populate the piece of land as a homebase with the structures she needs to contain her stuff while she's away. Of course wouldn't keep anything of too much value there in case it gets stolen... but it's the thought of a home base that counts.
So many potentials... the possibilities are endless.
