12-30-2016, 10:11 PM
Alright...
I'm picking up where I left off on this complete and utter atrocity of a show. Episode sux. I mean six.
At least I have pizza.
So in this episode the documentary producers are gonna take the main dude and chick back to the house for halloween or some shit. I've forgotten EVERYONE'S character name except for the little girl. Oh no wait, I forgot her fuckin' name too. This episode starts off with a super gay looking producer guy meeting other producer people in a pretentious office building, let's see how this banal dogshit unfolds.
Already taking the Lord's name in vain for no fucking reason... gotta get your societal degradation points in at every halfway plausible opportunity. *slow clap*
It's so fucking funny and dumb to me that these exec people are talking about how fucking great "My Roanoke Nightmare" is, how it's all "hot" and popular and shit, ROFL!!! Even in this totally fabricated AHS universe that isn't even fucking believable. More cheese than a bag of Cheetos, lame. Lame lame lame.
They LITERALLY just mentioned Facebook likes and Twitter followers. Talk about DATING THE ABSOLUTE SHIT out of this entire season, wow just wow just wow. A few years down the road, that is gonna be as laughable as mentioning MYSPACE. Oh but hey, they get the big bucks for mentioning these corporate shitstains, so it's worth dating the shit out of this season which is total garbage anyway so you know what, I AGREE. GREAT MOVE. Maybe use the money to make the next season NOT BE TOTAL SHIT.
Wow. I dunno if I can even watch this.
It just sucks so hard and is such shit.
The crew has rigged cameras in the house and rigged scary shit to happen like the sink turning on and pipes rattling.
Somebody left a pile of fetal pigs behind a tree at the house for the crew to find. And they found it and they were just like gee, wonder who did this?! So fucking dumb.
It's cool to see Kathy Bates in her role as the actress who plays the Butcher. She's super creepy... LOL, fucking love that bitch, she's an awesome actress. LOL, she mentions THE PATRIARCHY. ROFLROFLROFL. Wow, they slip it in everywhere... I bet Kathy Bates thinks this is SO DUMB. She may be a good actress but she can't really act like she doesn't think that shit is stupid. LMFAO, so the actress playing the Butcher apparently had like a mental breakdown and then ran around Hollywood as the Butcher and got put in a mental ward. And then she moved to Roanoke. ROFL!!! I dunno, it's a funny twist. Still epic lameness, but funny. She thinks she really is the butcher and she's gonna "smite" them all. LOL, pretty funny.
Man there is such a MASSIVE, MASSIVE difference between the chick who plays the real Lee and Angela who plays her in the documentary. The 'real' Lee actress chick is... just kind of... not digestible. I dunno what her deal is.
One of the crew people got killed on the set. LOL. And these fucking idiots aren't even perturbed. It's so fucking dumb. LOL.
So the producer lady just got all mad at the producer dude because he wanted to go on with the show, and she drove off and is documenting what really happened and why she's leaving from her car cam and now there's a creepy lady in the road.
But anyways, the whole rest of the show should have been about super fucking up the crew and the producers to the point they couldn't even carry the show through to a finish and just leave it some big unsolved thing. There are 10 episodes now, so maybe that's what ends up happening. I really doubt it though... I can't imagine them doing anything right with this season. They haven't so far, so why would they start now?
So of course there's a random pighead dude who just appears in the producer lady's car and she crashes and apparently her body was never found. Gotta say, the pighead people are the dumbest part of this show and that's saying a lot. They aren't scary, the concept isn't scary and none of their scenes are memorable whatsoever.
I think Sarah Paulson is really cute, but this horrid accent her "real" persona outside the documentary's got going on is just an abomination.
Whoa, that's unbelievable. Slow down. Give me some time. Wow. Something GENUINELY FUNNY just happened on this show. Unthinkable. It's a blooper scene where Evan Peters' character is leading them to safety through the dark tunnel and Sarah Paulson's character trips and falls, and they all break character. Evan Peters' character is coming onto Sarah Paulson's character during the blooper and asking her out. Which is hot... it's nice to see them injecting some sexuality into his appearance here that isn't warped and totally homo. Thanks for the 10 seconds of normalcy.
Okay so apparently Evan and Sarah's characters got MARRIED and now Evan is kissing Sarah which is hot. I mean it's better than him kissing a dude. Seems like Sarah (who is a real life lezbo) prettymuch likes it a lot and feels pretty lucky to be kissing Evan Peters, and as for Evan I think he prettymuch liked it too. I'm sure Emma beat him up later though... guy's a fuckin' pussy. Why the hell did they dye his hair red for this role. I mean as good as it is to see Evan Peters not being gay as fuck... I don't really care about their relationship. At all. I don't really care about seeing this. So Evan's character is apparently going to be leaving Sarah's alone for 6 months because he has a screen test to go to, and she's insisting she's not worried about him being gone that long. Then she gives the camera this super concerned look like she is scared. I mean WHAT THE FUCK. The worst that could happen is he divorces your ass... I mean you KNOW he's gonna cheat on you, it's a given. Why even act like you care?? That just bothers me, it's straight up dumb.
And now Sarah's character is getting all defensive and flipping out about an age comment this chick made over her and Evan's character being married. I mean, what the fuck is the hangup here. There are older dudes with younger chicks all the time, nobody cares. In this scenario, it's a rich and famous older chick with a young dude. It's fucking commonplace. It's literally nothing... but this rich/famous actress on this show is supposed to be ACTUALLY getting defensive and self-conscious about the situation?? Again, zero percent believable. Absolute zero.
I ACTUALLY think Evan Peters is kinda dumb. Like in real life. I think he must be kinda dumb. I'm just throwing that out there.
Awww shit, the message on the show just said during the Blood Moon, every single participant in the show died EXCEPT ONE. The show never aired and apparently the next footage is what was found and assembled. Or whatever. Which doesn't even make sense but, LOL. I'll take it. The cast is just obnoxious at this point and I'm even rooting for seeing Evan Peters' character get kaput. Really I think the writers WANTED the audience to feel this way about this season... there's no way they don't realize how utter trash Roanoke has been. There's just no way.
Evan Peters' "MOM" tattoo though. I can't believe he got that tattoo. And it's weird they didn't cover it up for the hot tub scene. I guess they figured it could have been plausible. It's funny because earlier in their wedding scene, he said something pervy and then said "Sorry mom!" Hmmm... and of course I also wonder if it really is a tribute tattoo for his mom or if "M.O.M." stands for something else. Man of Mystery? WTF is he jerking off in the hot tub? LOL, and I'm sorry but Evan as a tough dude in any capacity is not believable whatsoever. LOL the crazy nurses just killed the shit out of him though. Whatevs.
Well that's the end of that episode... might as well go ahead and start on the next one. Get this shit over with.
I'm picking up where I left off on this complete and utter atrocity of a show. Episode sux. I mean six.
At least I have pizza.
So in this episode the documentary producers are gonna take the main dude and chick back to the house for halloween or some shit. I've forgotten EVERYONE'S character name except for the little girl. Oh no wait, I forgot her fuckin' name too. This episode starts off with a super gay looking producer guy meeting other producer people in a pretentious office building, let's see how this banal dogshit unfolds.
Already taking the Lord's name in vain for no fucking reason... gotta get your societal degradation points in at every halfway plausible opportunity. *slow clap*
It's so fucking funny and dumb to me that these exec people are talking about how fucking great "My Roanoke Nightmare" is, how it's all "hot" and popular and shit, ROFL!!! Even in this totally fabricated AHS universe that isn't even fucking believable. More cheese than a bag of Cheetos, lame. Lame lame lame.
They LITERALLY just mentioned Facebook likes and Twitter followers. Talk about DATING THE ABSOLUTE SHIT out of this entire season, wow just wow just wow. A few years down the road, that is gonna be as laughable as mentioning MYSPACE. Oh but hey, they get the big bucks for mentioning these corporate shitstains, so it's worth dating the shit out of this season which is total garbage anyway so you know what, I AGREE. GREAT MOVE. Maybe use the money to make the next season NOT BE TOTAL SHIT.
Wow. I dunno if I can even watch this.
It just sucks so hard and is such shit.
The crew has rigged cameras in the house and rigged scary shit to happen like the sink turning on and pipes rattling.
Somebody left a pile of fetal pigs behind a tree at the house for the crew to find. And they found it and they were just like gee, wonder who did this?! So fucking dumb.
It's cool to see Kathy Bates in her role as the actress who plays the Butcher. She's super creepy... LOL, fucking love that bitch, she's an awesome actress. LOL, she mentions THE PATRIARCHY. ROFLROFLROFL. Wow, they slip it in everywhere... I bet Kathy Bates thinks this is SO DUMB. She may be a good actress but she can't really act like she doesn't think that shit is stupid. LMFAO, so the actress playing the Butcher apparently had like a mental breakdown and then ran around Hollywood as the Butcher and got put in a mental ward. And then she moved to Roanoke. ROFL!!! I dunno, it's a funny twist. Still epic lameness, but funny. She thinks she really is the butcher and she's gonna "smite" them all. LOL, pretty funny.
Man there is such a MASSIVE, MASSIVE difference between the chick who plays the real Lee and Angela who plays her in the documentary. The 'real' Lee actress chick is... just kind of... not digestible. I dunno what her deal is.
One of the crew people got killed on the set. LOL. And these fucking idiots aren't even perturbed. It's so fucking dumb. LOL.
So the producer lady just got all mad at the producer dude because he wanted to go on with the show, and she drove off and is documenting what really happened and why she's leaving from her car cam and now there's a creepy lady in the road.
But anyways, the whole rest of the show should have been about super fucking up the crew and the producers to the point they couldn't even carry the show through to a finish and just leave it some big unsolved thing. There are 10 episodes now, so maybe that's what ends up happening. I really doubt it though... I can't imagine them doing anything right with this season. They haven't so far, so why would they start now?
So of course there's a random pighead dude who just appears in the producer lady's car and she crashes and apparently her body was never found. Gotta say, the pighead people are the dumbest part of this show and that's saying a lot. They aren't scary, the concept isn't scary and none of their scenes are memorable whatsoever.
I think Sarah Paulson is really cute, but this horrid accent her "real" persona outside the documentary's got going on is just an abomination.
Whoa, that's unbelievable. Slow down. Give me some time. Wow. Something GENUINELY FUNNY just happened on this show. Unthinkable. It's a blooper scene where Evan Peters' character is leading them to safety through the dark tunnel and Sarah Paulson's character trips and falls, and they all break character. Evan Peters' character is coming onto Sarah Paulson's character during the blooper and asking her out. Which is hot... it's nice to see them injecting some sexuality into his appearance here that isn't warped and totally homo. Thanks for the 10 seconds of normalcy.
Okay so apparently Evan and Sarah's characters got MARRIED and now Evan is kissing Sarah which is hot. I mean it's better than him kissing a dude. Seems like Sarah (who is a real life lezbo) prettymuch likes it a lot and feels pretty lucky to be kissing Evan Peters, and as for Evan I think he prettymuch liked it too. I'm sure Emma beat him up later though... guy's a fuckin' pussy. Why the hell did they dye his hair red for this role. I mean as good as it is to see Evan Peters not being gay as fuck... I don't really care about their relationship. At all. I don't really care about seeing this. So Evan's character is apparently going to be leaving Sarah's alone for 6 months because he has a screen test to go to, and she's insisting she's not worried about him being gone that long. Then she gives the camera this super concerned look like she is scared. I mean WHAT THE FUCK. The worst that could happen is he divorces your ass... I mean you KNOW he's gonna cheat on you, it's a given. Why even act like you care?? That just bothers me, it's straight up dumb.
And now Sarah's character is getting all defensive and flipping out about an age comment this chick made over her and Evan's character being married. I mean, what the fuck is the hangup here. There are older dudes with younger chicks all the time, nobody cares. In this scenario, it's a rich and famous older chick with a young dude. It's fucking commonplace. It's literally nothing... but this rich/famous actress on this show is supposed to be ACTUALLY getting defensive and self-conscious about the situation?? Again, zero percent believable. Absolute zero.
I ACTUALLY think Evan Peters is kinda dumb. Like in real life. I think he must be kinda dumb. I'm just throwing that out there.
Awww shit, the message on the show just said during the Blood Moon, every single participant in the show died EXCEPT ONE. The show never aired and apparently the next footage is what was found and assembled. Or whatever. Which doesn't even make sense but, LOL. I'll take it. The cast is just obnoxious at this point and I'm even rooting for seeing Evan Peters' character get kaput. Really I think the writers WANTED the audience to feel this way about this season... there's no way they don't realize how utter trash Roanoke has been. There's just no way.
Evan Peters' "MOM" tattoo though. I can't believe he got that tattoo. And it's weird they didn't cover it up for the hot tub scene. I guess they figured it could have been plausible. It's funny because earlier in their wedding scene, he said something pervy and then said "Sorry mom!" Hmmm... and of course I also wonder if it really is a tribute tattoo for his mom or if "M.O.M." stands for something else. Man of Mystery? WTF is he jerking off in the hot tub? LOL, and I'm sorry but Evan as a tough dude in any capacity is not believable whatsoever. LOL the crazy nurses just killed the shit out of him though. Whatevs.
Well that's the end of that episode... might as well go ahead and start on the next one. Get this shit over with.
