"Gunsmoke" (1955) - Review & Commentary

[Chatwoman]

S11 E10 - "The Pretender"

2:20 strong open on this episode with some hardcore buggy chase action!!! Great shots of Matt riding hard.

3:38 everybody's got nice teeth on this show, not very believable for the era... but it's not like we'd really wanna see a bunch of people with some gnarly chompers anyways. The Boot Hill Museum had a really interesting display about dentistry in the old west complete with photos that showed what the typical frontier smile really looked like.

5:28 maybe you should shove some spicy meatballs in your mouth. Shrug.

6:25 it's Tom Simcox again, I want a man who looks like that. He'd make a great addition to my harem.

8:20 her guilting him into staying will probably cost him his life for one reason or another.

14:11 their dad is insufferable, the hell is this guy's problem?! They should work together to get their own place.

15:45 mmmmm, I just loooooove Italian.

17:16 rofl, Festus bragging about being with two chicks!!!

18:00 she looks like she wants to go get freaky behind the barn.

19:22 lol, Doc roasting Festus about his spurs. I mean, he IS literally the only guy wearing jingle bobs ;)

25:29 Frankie needs to abandon his entire family and leave Dodge... that's about the size of it. He's too good for all of it and he needs a fresh start far away.

27:30 hopefully she's dead. One down, two to go... Frankie rides. But you know that's not how it's gonna work out... the wrong son's gonna die!

29:27 I dunno, surely they won't be dumb enough to kill the best guest character in this episode. Maybe they'll get a dying confession out of his douchebag brother.

30:32 his dad is scum, this is why it doesn't pay to be loyal. I've literally never seen a character be treated worse on this show, no BS.

32:33 I don't get it... what does that mean?? Are they offering him a way out of his shitty situation or something??

33:10 that is a gorgeous horse, so shiny OMG.

36:10 I can't believe she's working in cahoots with the less hot brother this way... she just has bad taste, plain and simple.

38:40 whew, oh God man this is just sad. Most epic western soap opera ever!!!

43:06 hopefully Frankie will still decide to leave after it's all over.

48:30 meh that's a nice thought and all, but it's just daddy's guilt talking. Too late, old man. Frankie rides.

48:55 I think it was.

[Chatwoman]

S11 E11 - "South Wind"

6:28 him holding that huge knife while he's saying all this makes me think it ain't really optional.

30:03 is this guy from the cavalry?? They're making him seem MEGA dumb.

34:30 Festus, Doc, etc. better teach this kid not to be dumb. Things aren't going well for the fella so far, and he's pretty much totally unlikable to begin with.

39:27 damn yo, Dodge's new blacksmith looks like a world heavyweight champion lmfaolol.

41:50 why make this kid's character so totally unlikable?? No one is rooting for the kid... literally. No one. I think it's whack.

44:52 "You killed my pa, and I'm gonna kill you." Well fucking do it, boy. Don't just stand there talking about it. Sounds like you're about to chicken out. Lame.

49:30 "for a 12 year old man," lolol. Thank God for Festus.

[Chatwoman]

S11 E12 - "The Hostage"

1:00 oh my God, bahahahahaha. You know this is so accurate... tons of obnoxious drunks like this left at the end of the night. I like how Matt is there at closing time making sure he gets to pet the Kitty.

1:55 ooo, damn, this is some heavy flirting right here. All kinds of insinuation about some wild action taking place later between Matt and Kitty.

2:20 *proceeds to lock door* rofl, does the Marshal have a key or something??

3:20 *jumps* YIKES. Omg.

5:40 "...If you come upstairs with me and do the job Matthew failed to show up for lastnight?!"

13:48 I love it when Doc gets pushy, that's hot.

16:08 alright, that's it. I wasn't gonna say anything about this guy's voice but... I mean. You KNOW this is what he's known for, IF he was in a lot of other roles. Pretty sure I've heard that voice before... I mean it IS one of a kind. That's the best thing you can say about it.

16:20 it actually sounds like he may be feigning some of the deeper tones in his voice... it sounds more forced as he continues speaking in this scene. Hmm.

17:38 I mean his voice is just EFFIN' RIDICULOUS. But somehow?? SOMEHOW?! I swear it grows on you. I'm serious. I swear it. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darren_McGavin

19:40 the Marshal asks him WTF is up with his voice... LOL!

19:50 I bet he'll say he got hung but escaped somehow.

20:45 he's fucking iconic.

26:38 "I couldn't even remember his face." Guuuuuurrrrrrrrl. GUUUURRRRRLLLLL. I hear you. For real. I was just talking about this not too long ago... https://www.sectual.com/thread-18584-pos...#pid155042

[Chatwoman]

S11 E13 - "Outlaw's Woman"

2:25 dig all the beautiful scenery and the gorgeous horses... God I love the wild west!!! America's history is so cool and unique.

4:18 wow she has such an interesting look about her. She looks really familiar. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lane_Bradbury Never heard of her before but I did an image search and I definitely recognize her from other roles.

7:40 never scream at people like that when they're dying, it's so rude.

16:07 it looks like half her ridiculous set of false eyelashes are torn off one eye... what the fuck were they thinking?

[Chatwoman]

S11 E14 - "The Avengers"

This was the very first episode of Gunsmoke that I ever watched, back on page 1.

I didn't commentate because I was just watching to see if it was something that could be of interest to me.

Oh the nostalgia... I'm a Gunsmoke expert now!

[Chatwoman]

S11 E15 - "Gold Mine"

This is the episode I kept trying to watch on Pluto TV but it just kept skipping straight to the end and ruining the ending for me over and over again, rofl!

1:18 oooohhhh, Kittyyyyyy, work it baybeeeeee.

1:38 it looks like they're dropping her off in the middle of literally nowhere, with her luggage and a barrel of beer?!

7:30 shit, I'd be paying that dude to stay with me the entire time.

7:50 see what I mean?

8:46 damn. What's a lady to do in such a situation?! Yikes, just yikes, I mean YIIIIIKES.

11:40 thank God for Thad... hopefully we'll get to see him shoot somebody.

12:45 OMFG no WAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CANNOT believe it. I mean... maybe it was obvious from the get-go, MAYBE IT WAS. But I'm still blown away.

14:45 I love seeing Kitty beat up dudes.

19:08 good Lord, don't we all?!

26:28 this seems like a great time to strip down and bang super hard.

27:10 that's right Thad, take 'em off!

35:32 Thad is so chill... I love his personality.

40:22 it's so hot when he grabs people this way!!!

42:00 if I was Kitty, I'd be taking this mute guy home with me.

49:00 roflmao.

49:12 so, does Kitty get the gold mine money too?? Are we to take it that Kitty owns a gold mine from here on out???

49:50 hints at sexual favors to show her thanks to Matt!!!

[Chatwoman]

S11 E16 - "Death Watch"

6:03 I can tell by his tone she's totally gonna die.

23:40 it took me a while to recognize they were in the Long Branch (multitasking) because of the carpeted staircase... when did that happen? I actually think stairs are the ONLY part of a house/building that SHOULD be carpeted... fun fact.

24:20 all these dudes dripping with sweat and fanning themselves with their hats... no AC in the old west. I think that was probably way more of an issue than this show makes it out to be. Seems like it would have been hard livin'... maybe not though, maybe you'd kinda get used to it.

28:50 I bet he's right... it can be hard to sleep when it's 90 degrees, the locals will be restless.

29:27 I wonder what that sign on the wall says... https://i.imgur.com/tjHwR2B.png All I can make out is "life" right in the middle.

33:32 Thad's voice is sooo pleasant... it's like listening to a sweet song.

45:27 good Lord, is this Gunsmoke or Hellraiser?!

[Chatwoman]

S11 E17 - "Sweet Billy, Singer of Songs"

Oh this one should be interesting. Sweet Billy, wasn't he one of the super fucked up warped brothers on one of the other episodes?? https://www.sectual.com/thread-18541-pos...#pid155455 I thought they all moved back to the hills at the end of that one.

2:24 ROFL, they're after the "hangy down part" of Festus's ear again... *facepalm*

2:50 It's a different "Sweet Billy"... what the hell!? And he's inherited the dude boots. ROFL.

3:00 "We came to get us a woman!" That's what they were after with the other Sweet Billy character/episode too, only the woman was for Sweet Billy's brother.

3:28 so they're off to Dodge to do some woman hunting. This never ends well.

4:30 at least Billy is cute.

5:20 "SHE-MALE"!?!?!?!?!?!??!?1 Oh my God, I THOUGHT THAT'S WHAT THEY SAID BEFORE!!!!! But I thought WTF, I must have heard that wrong. But NO. They're looking for a "she-male"... WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?1 They want a woman who's tough I guess?? Wow this is CRAZY.

7:00 "Your own shack and some hogs and some chickens"... so it sounds like that's what it means, they want a woman who's super hot and not related to them, but a woman who is tough. A she "male"... a male-like "she". I just... I can't.

7:56 "I'm stout! And I'm healthy... and I got good teeth." roflmfao. Whhhhew.

8:20 I appreciate the Sweet Billy actor, he does a perfect "Haggen" accent.

8:36 so whatever these "she male" qualities are, he's whispering them in her ear right now. I guess what it's supposed to mean is a mystery. This is sooo bizarre.

20:15 it's Slim Pickens!!!!!!!!!!!

10:56 looks like there's gonna be some competition over Sweet Billy. I wonder if one of the ladies will try to kill the other?!

12:37 as adorable as Billy is, he'll definitely leave there with a wife. I guess they're gonna show us what a "she male" looks like in the Gunsmoke universe... o_0

13:38 well if Widow Folsome ain't a "she-male" I dunno who is.

13:54 rofl Billy's about to run for his life, I don't blame him!!!

14:00 oh thank God, I was wondering how the heck these two were gonna come across each other.

14:27 "You can WRITE?!" roflmfaolol, so I think I'm starting to get a somewhat better sense of what they mean by... the term. They're looking for a smart woman, I guess. But one who is still hot, since their first choice was a saloon girl, lmao.

14:30 she's a real looker too, I ship it hard.

14:45 I love them together... https://i.imgur.com/CZ2rXYg.png

15:20 you can really tell in this scene she's got that ridiculous bleached hair, but I really do like her so much I'll forgive it.

16:15 so we're not too far into the episode and Billy's already got his woman... what's the plot twist gonna be?? Maybe they've brought the great Slim Pickens in to play the oppositional force.

17:16 she's reading from the Song of Solomon, which is one of my faves.

20:46 well he's being super cool about it so I guess he's not the oppositional force.

20:50 "Papa, I was born female," ... WTTTTFFFF IS WITH THIS EPISOOOOODDDEEEEE.

21:30 "Never give nothin' away."

22:30 eh you know what, fine. He's the oppositional force after all, but it's Slim fricken Pickens, how you gonna be mad? If everybody in the community chipped in a few $$$, it's no problem.

26:10 Miss Kitty's just a hopeless romantic at heart! And Matt knows how to stay on a woman's good side.

30:20 rofl, Festus is just ordering them around... I am so 100% in agreement with his approach to life.

33:20 God I love Slim Pickens.

35:10 sounds like they're about to have one of them thar Kansas "Twisty" storms.

39:08 you never hear Sam yell at people!

39:12 I think four Haggens is just way too much for Dodge to handle.

42:00 so Festus rides a mule (Ruth) rather than a horse. I thought she was a donkey or a burro or something.

42:12 super '60s sounding music here, most obvious on the show yet. It's still western enough and it's a fun little tune so I'm not gonna count it against them.

47:08 ROFL @ Matt and Festus on a horse together!!!

[Chatwoman]

S11 E18 - "The Raid: Part 1"

This is the second two-parter in the whole series, maybe also the last.

1:38 this must be the raiding team. These guys seem organized, almost military style.

3:17 this scene is set in Sedalia, Missouri... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sedalia,_Missouri Pretty far away from Dodge, they must be about to do something bad-bad.

5:00 the guy leading is hot AF, I hope we see more of him.

5:40 I like how they're not even speaking. That's sexy as fuck... OMG.

6:10 most peaceful fuckin' bank robbery ever dude, you could fall asleep in the middle of that. Pretty unique, I've never seen a bank robbery portrayed that way before.

6:50 what the hell is their angle with raising all the ruckus as they're leaving?? So intriguing.

8:25 rofl, Festus is like a kid in this scene!

9:32 oh man, famous last words! Bahahaha. I think that's why it's a bad idea to say stuff like this. It's basically challenging the universe... the universe hears something like that and it goes "Hold my beer."

16:16 I dunno what it is, but this Jimmy guy's hair doesn't look appropriate for the era. Something about the cut, I dunno, it looks like it was done with an electric razor kinda situation or something. I dunno, just some kinda tool that wouldn't exist in the 1800s. It looks too perfect.

They really go above and beyond to give these two-parter episodes time to develop and they're very good.

18:15 this bank robber guy sure is personable.

18:40 this old guy seems like the charming type. Wonder how he's gonna try to finesse Kitty.

19:11 he immediately turns around and calls Dodge "charming" right after I type the above.

19:45 I mean she seems ever so slightly charmed by him. And I really don't think he's 100% making it up anyway. Just a solid 89%.

32:16 I love this still, look how sexy... https://i.imgur.com/OytsdaN.png *drool*

44:50 this poor young fella is so convincing though... he did great in his role.

45:20 gorgeous scenery, holy crap. I wanna live somewhere that looks like that!!!!!!!!!!!

48:50 DAMN the bass is poppin' rofl!!!

[Chatwoman]

S11 E19 - "The Raid: Part 2"

9:36 OMG they're burning down Dodge.

9:44 OMG NOOOO, NOT DELMONICO'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh man, this is kind of a disaster.

10:05 OMG like pretty much every building is on fire.

18:45 these intense camera angles would be even more hardcore in color. It's time.

45:40 wow, these guys are just plain fucked.

46:18 soooooo fucking dramatic though.

46:38 pretty sure this is the first time any hardass outlaw cowboy on this show has cried like a bitch over his partner getting killed, like suck it up bro.

47:00 really great chaotic twist on the camera work.

47:56 the dirtier Festus is, the more attractive he is. They're covered in soot and dirt and looking fine as hell.

49:46 Doc was so perfect in this ending scene... he conveyed all the feelings of sadness, the whole thing just being a shame, being so over it all just perfectly with his facial expressions, not a word.

[Chatwoman]

S11 E20 - "Killer at Large"

Oooo, this title is juicy AF, I'm ready thouuuughhh!!!!!!!

0:48 oh FFS, it's another magical medicine snake oil salesman... these guys must have been a real problem in the old west. It's so ridiculous it's surprising they ever made any sales... I mean after you've seen ONE, how could you be fooled by another??

1:46 bitchin' hat and vest on this guy, he looks like this 2000s actor that I will NEVER remember the name of or even a movie he was in... but the same guy looks a lot like Mark King, Level 42 bassist. Anyway, this dude's getting killed for sure. That's my bet.

2:40 well all that ruckus should bring the Marshal out.

3:40 whoa, he sure got triggered fast... there must be a whole heap of cocaine in that magic cure-all medicine.

6:30 Matt's kinda being a dick to Festus.

6:50 babies are born at night because the moon pulls on water/fluid.

7:20 these people are irresponsible to blow smoke up this guy's ass acting like he's great when he's a confrontational prick.

7:50 he's probably about to sock this old guy.

5:00 he's obviously jealous of Festus and his ego is out of hand.

9:40 well the lack of vocal cues from Festus were definitely a problem in this situation... sorry but it was stupid. That's the #1 thing people do the most in this show... they don't say enough.

9:58 "Well can we bang real quick before you go!?"

10:26 she's got a real purdy mouth.

13:20 no way I'd give up Ruth. He shouldn't even be running.

13:43 Applejack Saloon, what a great name!

15:50 where the heck does he even think he's going??

21:26 his mom is hawt... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geraldine_..._(actress)

24:33 this guy looks like Ian Hecox.

26:00 dangerous thing to strap on that unloaded gun. In other news, I ship this lady and Festus to be married.

27:55 the Marshal will find him by then. But I gotta say, I REALLY like this lady. I wish she had been a regular on this show. She's very enjoyable, and great to look at.

35:30 the fantasies of beating these guys with an aluminum pole are intense.

36:30 he needs his ass beat... she's way too excusing.

40:36 oh stop crying like a bitch, you little dipshit.

42:30 where the hell are Thad and the Marshal?

43:42 I mean look how bored these dudes are, no wonder they pick fights with anyone who comes into town. It's worse than Chester playing with a rope.

46:20 well that was unexpected and totally gratifying.

48:10 Thad is honestly so beautiful.