Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
05-04-2019, 03:25 PM
As many of you may know, I have a history of being hobosexual...
Hey it's not my fault there are some hotass homeless dudes out there.
What is my brilliant idea?? Well some of you may also know I'm attempting to tent camp in the back yard.
Basically, the idea is, you set up a tent on your land where it can sort of be seen by any passerbys, but where it would REALLY appeal to a hobo who had the eye for scoping out good spots...
And essentially, the tent functions as a hobo trap!!!
Do you know about hobo hieroglyphs?
During the Great Depression, when a hobo found a household that was good for a free meal or handout or whatever, he would draw discrete little symbols on the door frame of the backdoor to tell the other hobos the lady of the house was cool.
So you could draw hobo signs on your door frame to attract them.
Posts: 283
Threads: 0
Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
(05-04-2019, 03:30 PM)Guest Wrote: Do you know about hobo hieroglyphs?
During the Great Depression, when a hobo found a household that was good for a free meal or handout or whatever, he would draw discrete little symbols on the door frame of the backdoor to tell the other hobos the lady of the house was cool.
So you could draw hobo signs on your door frame to attract them.
(05-04-2019, 03:34 PM)Guest Wrote: https://www.symbols.com/category/52
Wow...
Holy shit.
See...
This is part of my fucking destiny because it's already a thing.
This is just part of history...
Maybe it's even in my lineage, maybe it's even in my DNA.
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
(05-04-2019, 03:43 PM)Guest Wrote: Paint this one on your door frame:
https://www.symbols.com/symbol/lusty-woman
I fucking love you for this, man.
(05-04-2019, 03:53 PM)Mister Obvious Wrote: I fucking love you for this, man.
Suddenly, I'm overcome with a strange compulsion to become a hobo. 
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
*buys several small solar panel yard light combos to strategically place leading up to hobo trap tent*
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
New dating site idea...
hotasshobos.com
Ya want I should come over and tinker with your Commodore 64 a little? 
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
I'm gonna need you to season the outfit you'll be wearing for at least a few weeks first.
(05-04-2019, 04:00 PM)Mister Obvious Wrote: I'm gonna need you to season the outfit you'll be wearing for at least a few weeks first.
Do you prefer butt funk, or do you lean more towards sack cheese?
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
It's not about any of that, I can tell you've never been a hobo before...
We're gonna have to send you to hobo school.
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
The thing is, true hobos really don't use tents...
And I understand that but...
We've gotta have somewhere to get it on.
Maybe place your tent over a big hole and put a lighter in the middle of the tent. We all know hobos are constantly asking for a light and it would be irresistible. Thats if you want to forcibly confine his derelict ass for starters...till he is broken in
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
Dating site homepage video/off-site ad transcript:
*me standing in front of green screen which is displaying slideshow of hobo dating profile pics*
"Hello and welcome to HotassHobos.com. Sexy hobos are my Kryptonite. This selection of highly fuckable homeless dudes has been handpicked by me, and these guys have held up to my rigorous hobo standards. If they can handle me, they can DEFINITELY handle you. *laugh* So come get some of that sweet hobo meat... at HotassHobos.com."
(05-04-2019, 04:05 PM)Mister Obvious Wrote: It's not about any of that, I can tell you've never been a hobo before...
We're gonna have to send you to hobo school.
The Mister Obvious Institute of Advanced Hobo Studies
Posts: 79,958
Threads: 4,857
Joined: May 2016
Can I skip freshman year since I already know the hobo signs? I'm in sort of a hurry to slip into your tent... err... I mean get started on my rewarding and glamorous career as a king of the road.
|
