Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
06-06-2017, 08:55 PM
I gotta say...
This is something I totally fucking hate.
LOL! I hate it. I actually do.
Everybody write this down...
This is something that genuine totally annoys me and I CANNOT fucking stand it.
This is prime material to troll me with in the future if you want to trigger the absolute shit out of me.
It's right up there with debates like female ejaculation, circumcision, and other topics I literally despise.
"It'd be so nice to have a massage right now" ... "Have you ever thought about learning some massage techniques?"
ROFLMAO, no but I'll tell you what I have thought about...
I've thought about how I'd rather BE SHOT IN THE FUCKING FACE WITH A 19 MILLION VOLT STUN GUN than have to fucking give your sorry ass a massage, you obnoxious piece of shit.
Okay...
That's all.
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
I'd literally rather jump off a bridge into a dry river bed full of jagged rocks.
That's one of my favorites.
Posts: 779
Threads: 336
Joined: May 2017
so i guess you never considered massage therapist as a career ? lol , i pay one lady $85 for an hour
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
(06-06-2017, 08:59 PM)Kitty Von Catsworth Wrote: so i guess you never considered massage therapist as a career ? lol , i pay one lady $85 for an hour
If it's your JOB, it's DIFFERENT.
If you're a freaking professional, someone who OBVIOUSLY has an ACTUAL INTEREST in the subject...
Then FINE.
But honey...
You want a fucking massage?
You get yourself a professional, or a mistress, or ANYBODYYY but me.
ANYBODYYY.
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
I mean holy hell...
It ACTUALLY offends me.
I find myself totally OFFENDED.
ROFL!
I have to get to the core of it and assess why it totally offends me.
I think it's because...
Number one, I hate putting effort into any kind of intimate contact. Totally hate it.
We're either banging, or we're doing nothing that interests me at all. That's the bottom line.
I am a person of extremes... it's either holding hands, or pounding pelvis.
That's IT.
That's all I care about.
Somebody asks me to fucking scratch their back (how fucking WEIRD is that in the first fucking place?) or massage them...
Oh my God.
It's just this feeling inside of me that screams, "I DO NOT LIKE YOU ENOUGH FOR THAT."
It's this feeling that SCREAMS, "WHO ARE YOU? WHY WOULD I DO THAT FOR YOU?"
IT SCREAMS, "WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM?"
That's what it says.
Posts: 779
Threads: 336
Joined: May 2017
yeah ok , but you must enjoy being massaged !
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
(06-06-2017, 09:05 PM)Kitty Von Catsworth Wrote: yeah ok , but you must enjoy being massaged !
Anytime anyone has tried to massage me, it has straight up PISSED me OFF.
It DOES NOT feel good.
It DOES NOT.
Yeah, I've never had it from a pro. Maybe that would be different.
I don't know. But I don't even WANT to find out.
If I can't find a way to massage myself...
If I can't DO IT MYSELF...
Then I really just don't care to do it. I really just don't.
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
I REJECT MASSAGE.
REFUSAL. HAPPENING.
Posts: 779
Threads: 336
Joined: May 2017
(06-06-2017, 09:08 PM)Trix Wrote: I REJECT MASSAGE.
REFUSAL. HAPPENING.
I would sure love to test that out , I think you would be purring like a kitten in less than 5 minutes with my giant hands working you over ,lol.
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
I love big hands more than anything in the world.
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
I'd rather wash somebody's feet with my hair than give a massage.
Posts: 3,726
Threads: 311
Joined: Sep 2017
(06-06-2017, 09:25 PM)Trix Wrote: I'd rather wash somebody's feet with my hair than give a massage.
Leave your hair alone munchkin its nice hair.
Ive got a pressure washer just use that.
03-09-2018, 01:26 PM
I was speaking with my coworker about me wanting a massage, the thing is I find it disgusting having someone massage me, but it would feel good on my back if it is tight and sore, I use the shower head with a focused stream to massage my back and stretching feels hella good. I'd rather give a massage than receive one, i'd karate chop yo ass!
Kitty van dorf looks like she needs a massage to straighten her out a little.
(03-09-2018, 02:24 AM)Fungus Wrote: Leave your hair alone munchkin its nice hair.
Ive got a pressure washer just use that.
holy shit, it sounds like she's done that before
I'd be staring like wtf is this shit
Posts: 450
Threads: 15
Joined: May 2017
i love giving a cock massage.
(03-09-2018, 01:53 PM)Cream of Caulk Wrote: i love giving a cock massage.
What are the benefits of a massaged cock?
Posts: 80,198
Threads: 4,863
Joined: May 2016
(03-09-2018, 01:26 PM) Wrote: i'd karate chop yo ass!
Thaaank you...
Posts: 280
Threads: 8
Joined: Mar 2018
(03-09-2018, 01:55 PM)Guessed Wrote: What are the benefits of a massaged cock?
It makes a stiff cock limber, just like any other kind of massage.
Sometimes when you have muscle cramps or a crick in your neck or whatever, a massage is the only thing that'll help. It may not feel good at the time, but when everything loosens up and pops back into place it's like heaven on earth.
|
