InfoWars’ Jake Lloyd: Adorably Inspired By & Modeled After Alex Jones

[Mister Obvious]

OMFG he's ADORABLLLLEEEEEE.

7:46 OMG YAAAAAAS.

I LOOOOOOOVE this kid, oh my God.

He's fucking amazinggggg.

And look how great his hair is too.

It's sooooo nice.

He's got amazing eyebrows too, you guys know I have an eyebrow fetish...

http://www.sectual.com/thread-5491.html

He's got a wonderful smile too, even his teeth are adorable...

He really looks unique, yet vaguely familiar.

He's so special, OMG.

[Mister Obvious]

He's so smart too...

[Mister Obvious]

It even looks like he kind of has a widow's peak?!

ANOTHER fetish!!!

http://www.sectual.com/thread-872.html

[Guest]

Liz Wheeler has a sort of widow's peak thing going too.

[Mister Obvious]

YAAAAAAS.

WIDOW'S PEAK THOUUUGH.

So hot, OMG I can't stand it.

[Guest]

You should totally join Liz in the hot tub. And post video.

[Mister Obvious]

I hate getting in the hot tub with other people, ew!

http://www.sectual.com/thread-4671.html

I'd get in it with Jake though.

With the underlying goal of Jake getting into me.

[Guest]

I hate getting in the hot tub with other people, ew!

It's Liz Wheeler though. I bet she's so clean it squeaks like a balloon when you slip a finger in there.

[Mister Obvious]

LOL, somebody in the comments asking how old Jake is.

He's actually an Aries Dog, don't ask me how I found out.

[Mister Obvious]

At least I'm pretty sure he is.

The Chinese zodiac Dog part of the equation, I wouldn't have guessed.

The Aries part is easier to believe because he says WTF he thinks.

[Mister Obvious]

To be honest, Jake Lloyd is probably the best reporter InfoWars has besides Alex himself.

I know that sounds like a lot...

But I sincerely believe it.

He really, truly is.

[Kitty]

He's a little too young and boyish for me, I need a burly man like Alex

[Mister Obvious]

I know, he looks so super young.

Imagine how attractive he'll be in 20 years if he keeps going in this direction...

[Mister Obvious]

Dude on the real though...

Jake Lloyd needs to delete his Twitter account.

https://twitter.com/jacobclloyd

It's hard to believe it's his because it's so cringey and horribad.

[Mister Obvious]

Like...

I know basically everything I say and do is cringey and horribad, but I'm not trying to go for a career as a straight-laced, tight-assed, mega conservative, mega Christian reporter either.

[Mister Obvious]

Not that reporting for InfoWars is conventional or something...

I mean it's fringe.

But it's still professional.

And his weird Twitter posts don't help shit AT ALL.

[Mister Obvious]

How can he be so smart and well spoken in his videos and sound so...

Erm, DIFFERENT on Twitter?

[Mister Obvious]

I have a new fetish...

Dudes who turn me on talking about other dudes who also turn me on.

[Mister Obvious]

This vid killed my ladyboner for Jake Lloyd deader than a box of rusty nails... or Occasional-Cortex’s brain cells.

I had to update this thread/title/OP accordingly...

This approach permanently slaughtered my ladyboner for Jake Lloyd.

I dunno if they’re smoking crack over there at InfoWars these days or what but LMAO...

Ew.