The X-Files (1993) - Review & Commentary
Season 2 - Episode 14 - "Die Hand Die Verletzt"

Not digging the title of this one, sounds pretentious.

0:17 oh this guy has a SEXY voice.

1:15 I get the impression they ain't gonna be prayin' to Jesus.

4:08 uuuhhh, how about no.

8:50 WTF is that Carrot Top?!

9:20 "Get some what??"

15:50 having them dissect animals in school IS kinda satanic.

19:00 so this episode is about satanic luciferian ritual abuse of children and in general.

20:00 Jesus dude this shit just went from bad to worse!

27:50 Mulder knows better! That look in his eyes... really is enough to make you cum your pants.

31:50 I dunno why the fuck this guy is bringing animals into the equation... animals don't do stupid shit like ritual sacrifices and abuse, LMAO!

Important topic, but... not sad for this episode to be over.
Not to derail but have you ever seen Chris Carter's other show "Millennium" ?
It's pretty bad ass. And the main character guy [Frank Black] has been on
The X-Files as Frank Black. Pretty cool stuff. I'm also stalled out on my Millennium
binge-watch, hahaha.
Never heard of it til now...

The synopsis sounds GOOOOOOOD.
Season 2 - Episode 15 - "Fresh Bones"

It's an interesting title because bones are never really supposed to be fresh.

0:53 oh lady you need to let that poor guy leave. Don't say anything, don't look the wrong way, don't do NOTHIN' except go and tend to that screamin' babychild cuz shit's about to get ugly in here.

1:05 I wouldn't say A WORD to this guy OR look at him... motherfucker's clearly shook.

1:12 oh God, he's sitting down, what a nightmare. No eye contact. Shut the kid up!

1:22 oh God, this chick... surely there's gotta be a better time than now to breach this subject.


1:45 ugh God, now they're crying... just take the kid and get the fuck out of the room, QUICK!

1:58 I mean yeah I get that she cares and stuff, but man sometimes you just gotta let a motherfucker go crazy and then run off and die, gnomesayin'? There's just nothing to be done about it.

2:45 I mean yeah it's super sad cuz he was mega hot, but the poor guy was too crazy to bang... and when things get to that point, it's just best to cut your losses.

7:30 sell the house and move, obvs.

16:10 I was about to say this episode sucks balls, but then there was a plot twist.

Is it enough to not make the episode suck though?

19:40 yeah I'm sorry, this episode just sucks balls.


I'm sure somebody out there likes the episodes that I don't like, so I'm not gonna say it's a generally bad episode but... yeah, I didn't like it.
(11-04-2019, 10:22 PM)Mister Obvious Wrote: The synopsis sounds GOOOOOOOD.

It's a great show, I think you'll really like it!
Season 2 - Episode 16 - "Colony"

Mulder's story really makes you feel a lot of sympathy for him, it really endears him to the audience.

1:50 awww... poor Mulder done got fucked up!

Scully is such a great character and whatnot... she really is. I just wish I had never looked at Gillian Anderson's Instagram... why are both she and David Duchovny so bizarrely obsessed with sex?!

3:50 "It's gonna crash" how could he POSSIBLY know that??

4:38 oh this guy looks scared!!!

5:06 ooo, SOMEBODY'S not human!?

6:06 so they're directly implying that those who run abortion clinics are inhuman.

16:00 the CIA?! ERMERGERD!!!


He got the wind knocked out of him... that happened to me once when I fell out of a tree.

23:20 check out those righteous shoes Scully's wearing!!!

27:25 WTF Mulder has a family?? I've never thought of that.

28:10 very strange. I'd be taking Scully with me to see my family, LOL. Like for sure.

30:50 something's totally off here. Mulder's gotta know.

31:20 OMG is this for real??? They're pulling the sister card NOW??? Scully must really be in danger!!!

Mulder's gotta know there are some kinda gamez afoot.

32:28 "I don't see who else it could be."

35:25 LOL now she's saying her adoptive parents are aliens LMAO.

43:55 oh fuck, dude... I'm kinda hardcore turned on by the prospect of a Mulder clone. Can we get the real Mulder here and make a sammich out of it??

This is another "To Be Continued" episode.
Season 2 - Episode 17 - "End Game"

I am DEFINITELY not the only one who wants a Mulder/Mulder/Scully threesome.

DOUBLE Mulders... God yes.

1:40 Captain guy is a Pisces for sure.

4:25 clone Mulder's a lil too violent for my tastes, but dial it back a little bit and I'm definitely turnt!!! *nanarub*

4:35 he definitely does not do violent very convincingly though.

7:55 actually he doesn't have to trust you lady.

13:00 bahahahahaha I love how he traded his sister for Scully... I mean, unanimously we agree, he absolutely made the right choice.

15:07 Mulder's hostility here is unreasonable... it's not far fetched to think she could be a clone.

16:16 he totally did the right thing. It's all about reproduction, let's face it... Mulder can reproduce with Scully. But his sister, worthless. LOL.

17:20 awe I feel so bad for Mulder.

17:55 exactlyyy.

21:26 so his sister was alien abducted and cloned.

29:50 what's with the tape on the window? Mulder did that in another episode?

Oh so it's about trying to contact the secret source... intriguing!!!

Such a great fucking show man.

32:20 this Skinner guy grows on you, I gotta say.

38:35 is this what he sounds like during sex?
(11-05-2019, 09:45 PM)Mister Obvious Wrote: 29:50 what's with the tape on the window? Mulder did that in another episode?

Oh so it's about trying to contact the secret source... intriguing!!!

Wait a damn minute...

If the source knew where Mulder was, then why'd he fall for the ol' "X on the window" trick???

Season 2 - Episode 18 - "Fearful Symmetry"

0:25 I don't agree with this guy, I think they should dance for the cams.

1:10 WTF OMG?! An invisible herd of buffalo!?

2:00 OMG it's an elephant!

6:50 Mulder's kind of a smartass sometimes.

10:20 so this episode is about elephant abuse? Great. *facepalm* That's not depressing at all.

10:46 damn who's this hotass dude with the super fake blonde hair!?

13:20 mid-90s video chatting.

The hottie's name is Garvin Cross and in this episode cast list he's called the "Red Head Kid"... ummm, that's BLONDE.

Apparently Garvin Cross is a stuntman... that's super hot. Stunt driver... OMG. Sigh. Yowza.

16:55 see. Super blonde.

17:25 aw, darn... he's getting teh killed. By a totally gnarly sounding animal.

18:25 wow that's like the maddest Scully's ever been.

21:45 LOL this is awesome.

26:35 God... Mulder turns me on so hard.

30:50 I gotta tell you... season 2 has not been that awesome. I mean I still feel like it's a great show, but... some of the plots I just could not care less about. This is one of them.
Season 2 - Episode 19 - "Dod Kalm"

1:22 that's a Newfie accent.

4:08 if it wasn't for David Duchovny, this show would suck.


6:50 the Philadelphia Experiment... my first conspiracy theory!!!

So he's saying these people time traveled by way of wormholes on Earth, and that's why they aged rapidly. It sort of makes you think about whether there could be any validity to this idea, but on a less dramatic scale.

There IS a strange anomaly in the North Atlantic...

In fact, I have my own 'time displacement' story which occurred in that part of the world...

10:26 I'd hop on Mulder and ride it so hard.

11:08 oh SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

12:00 this episode has a really good plot, I like it.

12:30 OMG gross!!!!!!!!!

13:00 I literally jumped, LMAO OMG!!!

13:15 OMFG... not good. NOT GOOOOOOOD.

This is honestly legit scary, I can't even lie.

This episode OMG SOOO scary though.

The scariest episode so far for sure.

16:28 whoa, check out that guy's mad fingernails! The envy of any 2019 bimbo!

17:28 this other captain guy needs to walk the plank.

22:00 oh fuck, what a nightmare!!! SHIIIIIIITTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

22:36 LOL @ how calm Scully is. Girl, no. Just no.

23:26 so it's basically free radicals causing this... and then Scully explains the theory. It's great.

25:22 good response, man.

31:45 this episode is fuuuuuuuuucked up, yo.

34:20 if I was her I'd shoot him then and there.

37:20 dude this is honestly horrible... this fucking episode though.

Dismal AF. Still better than the ones that suck though.

40:50 she's right about that shit.

This episode is sad as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Crazy episode dude... good shit.
Season 2 - Episode 20 - "Humbug"

Gotta say, season 2 of the X-Files just hasn't been that great. Looks like this episode has a dumb as fuck plot. If it wasn't for Mulder, I'd never watch this show.

I mean he's just so damn fucking likable and sexy.

4:55 circus people are so cool.

6:30 what the FUCK... just happened?

11:50 "unimaginative necktie design" ROFLMFAO.

19:40 LOL Mulder has a great sense of humor.

26:04 "You'd be surprised how many men do as well" OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!! HE DID NOT!!!!!!!!!!!

34:17 "More comfortable than a futon" ROFLROFLMFAO.

37:50 what a story!

TBH I barely watched this episode... it was better than I was expecting it to be according the the synopsis though.
Season 2 - Episode 21 - "The Calusari"

God I hope season 3 is better than this one has been.

0:56 LOL this kid is like fuck y'all.

1:30 I wonder if people ever look at their kids and think "Yeah, he's totally gonna be a serial killer."

1:57 EXCUSE me? They better not let anything happen to this cherubic little boy!!! You don't just chain your kids up outside the stall, WHO DOES THAT?

3:28 LOL if they seriously let this baby get killed I am never gonna watch this fucking show again LMAO.


12:30 LMFAO a nightmare in-law scenario.

15:30 I'm guessing it ain't the kid.

The lady only said if you marry a devil you get a devil child, she never said it was the husband who was the devil.

16:45 that's a good lookin' chicken.

18:30 LOL this is retarded.

22:56 LOL what a nasty old lady.

29:16 haven't you ever watched a horror movie, lady?


32:15 God this kid is so obnoxious and unlikable... I don't care if it's his evil twin or not.

33:40 fuuuuck that, scream for help!!!

37:30 LOL I can't believe he legit sent Scully over there alone.

39:18 "Look away or it will recognize you!" LMAO OMG. Probably the best part of the episode.

41:15 LOL these guys are scared as shit.

43:10 well that's not unsettling at all, LMAO!

Wow it takes a long time for these X-Files episodes to ever get good, and sometimes they really never do.
As much as I love Mulder, I just dunno about this show.

I don't mean to offend any X-Files devotees...

I've been told by people that the show gets better and whatnot...

I dunno, we'll see.

I love Mulder/Duchovny...

I really liked Scully/Gillian but ugh, those Instagram revelations. Yikes.

It's just not enough.

It should be better by this far into the show, it's only got 9 seasons.

Maybe I'm being unreasonable, but meh.

I'm not saying it's not a great show... I do think it is.

But I think a lot of the storylines are just ridiculous... and they didn't have to be.

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