SECTUAL

Saturday morning just got better - DUMPSTER CANDY!!! *probably wouldn't eat it*
I'm not much for candy. I'm more a baked-goods kinda guy. However, the occasional 
Snickers or peanut M&M's are always nice.

At 10:18 of the above video - I would crawl my monkey ass into that bitch if that's
fucking Super Bubble bubble gum! I ain't eeeeeeven fuckin' lyin'! Dude, Super Bubble...

YES!!!! Some of that shit IS Super Bubble bubble gum!! *joy*
Welp, we've found my dumpster-Achille's Heel - Hostess snack cakes, pecan pie and Super Bubble.

*sugar-whore*

"Fuck me? Fuck you!" - Quickly becoming my favorite Vic'ism.  

Personally, I would never pay more than $300k for a house. In fact, closing costs and ALL
other bullshit INCLUDED, I'd keep it at the $295k mark. I'd just have to. Otherwise I'd feel
like a cunt.

Me: "I just paid $310k for a house."
Also Me: "You are a fucking cunt."
Me: : (

Uh, OK...



The cat's like "Daaaamn, dis muhfucka TRIPPIN!!"  lewerlz

life...its either cherry red or midnight blue 
depending on if you were breast fed 

This about some of the craziest shit I ever done seen!

And by the looks of it, his last. Somebody give the poor little guy some utensils!

Hahahahaha!!

Comes up, takes a bite, back in the water. Rinse, repeat. Several times! lol

Duuude, I bet those popsicles are soooooo gross!! lol



"Uh, they're for  's, dumbass..."

: (

gotta g et me some of them seal catching mittens

Cute little dinosaur motherfuckers.

Spain needs to rethink some things - namely - Running with the bulls.
It SHOULD BE - Running with the seals. You're fucking welcome, Spain!

"So don't even start wit me!" lol

"Don't kill the messenger."

"Don't get cute wit me!" lmao - Uncle Vic channeling Uncle Rocco, hahahaha!!

"Read about it on your Google machines!" Wahhahahahaha, fuckin' Vic... lol

3:01 - 3:51 -- Piper is a female raccoon.

4:04 - Cat: "Fuck are you doin'?"
Raccoon: "Meeeooowww" *chips, chips, chips*
Cat: "You're not a cat."
Raccoon: "I haz noms." *chips, chips, chips*
Cat: "You shouldn't even BE indoors, let alone on the countertops!" *indignation*
Raccoon: "Nomz?"
Cat: "Fuck out my house bitch!!!"

4:15 - 4:17 -- Piper is now a male raccoon... 

4:27 - Aww, kitteh haz chip. *nom, nom, nom*

5:02 - Ya damn skippy them chili-cheese Fritos are gonna win, fuck kinda contest is that?? *pffftt*

5:08 - 5:21 -- Aaaaand Piper is female again. *palms the face, twicely*

6:10 - "Raise up off muh chipz, bitdch!" lol

7:20 - 7:40 -- Yeah, I CAN see that... *totally unsanitary*

7:49 - 8:00 -- Not only do they have a RACCOON INNN their house, but ON their countertops.
Along with several cats, perched on every surface. TOTALLY not eating at these people's house. EVERRR!!!

9:42 - Sorry, I held my tongue as long as I could: Those Sun Chips are fucking NAST!!! Guhrooossss.

10:29 - 10:35 -- Them crunchy ASMR noms though... lol


Welp, I've come to a conclusion: I would 100% own an indoor raccoon. Yes. I would.

Date night! How do I look in the mirror? I don’t want to watch this twice so I’ll post it immediately and watch together with ya’ll. lol

Keep moving forward. In a Good way.

Awwww, it's Granny Shirl.



She's such a cute little lady. Reminds me of my momma. I'd like to bake some peanut-butter
chocolate chip cookies with her! We could make ourselves sick on 'em! lol

I don't eat a lot of bread but I bet this is really good. I'd like to make it one day.

@ 2:27 - 2:46 little man syndrome and dirty wench  ...this was 1944 so not too much longer and that street was bombed to shit